Breaking up is painful and messy enough. Your technology should make it easier to cope.
I submit the following ideas to cyberspace.
1. Facebook Breakup Application
Updates your page to indicate your relationship status as single or hides your relationship status altogether based on your preferences
Notifies your closest friends tactfully of the breakup through their news feed so that they can be sensitive without making you relive the experience by retelling the same story to all of your friends
Archives all photos tagged with both of your names together into a hidden folder that requires password to access when logged into your own account
2. Gmail breakup label
All threads from a sender can be selected and labeled breakup (or breakup followed by .any text i.e. breakup.jeffrey). When archived, all conversations are sent to hidden folder that is protected from user viewing or rereading them by password and mandatory survey that assesses the user's emotional vulnerability (check the box next to any of the following sad thoughts you have had today:).
Label preferences can be custom set to unprotect folder access within 60 days, 90 days, 6 months, one year or never, or to never be accessible between 9:00 pm and 7 am.
3. Gmail chat breakup mode
Contact can be selected as "ex" option under "Show in chat list." Options then appear for the length of time contact should be blocked (60 days, 90 days, 6 months, one year or never).
Editing contact preferences to unblock contact before the defined date requires user to complete mandatory survey that assesses the user's emotional vulnerability (check the box next to any of the following reasons for unblocking your ex:).
If user changes the same contact from "ex" to "auto" back to "ex" more than three times in a one-month period, contact will be automatically blocked for 60 days. To override, user must e-mail "breakup@gmail.com," which e-mails back a lecture about being strong, with links to inspirational articles about starting over, and a link labeled "are you sure you want to unblock this contact?" at the bottom.
4. Mobile WAP breakup application
Application prevents caller from dialing or smsing a selected phone number between 10 pm and 7 am.
Breathalyzer attachment prevents caller from dialing or smsing a selected phone number when blood alcohol content is over 0.1%.
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4 comments:
Great post. I think another helpful idea is to hard code the phone so that any time you try to reach someone marked as an 'ex' the call or SMS gets rerouted to a reliable 3rd party (best friend, mom, therapist, whatever) and they are allowed to make the judgement call on whether you can contact your ex given the situation. Additionally, they would also have the authority to turn this function off when you are deemed ready. You would be my reliable 3rd Party, Lee :)
I rather liked this service that is available in OZ.
Hilarious. And brilliant. You'll have my order!
bravo, lee
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