low-impact dating

My ex-boyfriend left San Francisco today to relocate to Big Sur. I think both of us were relieved that now the most essential elements for drama – proximity, history, emotions – would be all but removed and the drama could fizzle out.
I will argue to the end that since I have already formed a successful friendship with my ex-ex-boyfriend that I am capable of it and not at fault for our inability to in this scenario, but he always used to say it takes two to tango. I don’t think I’m difficult, but I am a sucker, and emotional and a pushover. My ideals in these situations are now long gone.
So bon voyage, ex-boyfriend. I wish you the very best living in the forest, as you incessantly told me you preferred over living in what I think is the best place ever. Please, let’s let this be the end of drama between us, because, among other reasons, it’s just not convenient or practical anymore. And I am a busy girl.

In the interim, I must say I’m as astounded as you are that I’ve become a person who doesn’t *hate* to date.
After some deliberation my roommates and I decided that what I am doing is probably called dating, even though I only went on a singular date last week, and spent most of my energy chasing another guy who cancelled our date and my most recent prospect is a third guy who may or may not actually call me. It was the most eventful week of my adult dating life. Granted, prior to this I only tried to date in the high school and community college scene of San Jose and in and around the college scene in Los Angeles.
Everybody, particularly my mother, used to tell me I should entertain several guys at once and play the games and not get my heart too set on anything if I want to date without getting too hurt or demoralized. I thought this was officious, detached, cynical bullshit that would be profoundly depressing to entertain.
Now I’m trying a similar model based on low-impact dating. I still get just as excited and junior high-level stupid over boys, but I try to lower the stakes tremendously, partly by spreading myself thin over several simultaneous prospects and vowing to use everything that does not help me achieve ultimate happiness or mind-blowing self-actualization as material for my Suburbia novel.
Because one of the reasons I and my fellow imaginative females think and talk so much about boys is because television and suburban dullness have brainwashed us into thinking being alone isn’t as fun and that ultimate happiness and self-actualization can come from intense love relationships. Sadly, it’s kind of true some of the time.